My birthday was this past Saturday (yay!) and with another year older comes more wisdom (or so I hope). So I thought I’d share 23 things that I’ve learned since being 23.

1. If you’re not happy stop doing it.

You’re 20s are supposed to be filled with exciting new experiences!  There’s no reason to have to be unhappy with something that you can control.  Let that part of your life go, and you’ll be much happier.

2. Stop setting yourself on fire to keep others warm.

This goes for friends, boyfriends/girlfriends, and anyone else you can think of.  Who cares if you’ve been friends since you were little?  If they don’t care enough for your health and well-being; you don’t need them in your life anymore.

3. It’s ok not to have (pardon my French) shit together.

This is coming from a person who finally knows what she wants to do.  It’s a little overwhelming when you see the people you grew up with going to Law School.  Hell, my friend is becoming a freaking Rocket Scientist!  But you can’t look at their success as your failure.  Keep going, you’ll get there!

4. Have fun.

While you’re stressing about everything that’s going on in life, you cannot forget to have fun.  You want to be able to look back at your 20s with a wide smile and no regrets.  You’ll never be as young as you are right now.

5. Don’t give in to people annoyances.

That’s exactly what they want.  Some people feed off of knowing that they got under someone’s skin.  Reveling in the fact that they achieved a reaction from you.  ‘Just think to yourself that all they want is attention’ and be on with your day.

6. You’re stronger than you think.

Looking back at all that I have gone through–good and bad, I have grown and triumphed over every situation ahead.  Every morning when you wake up, there’s a clean slate.  And there’s always a better day.

7. Knowing how to cook is an amazing skill to have.

Not only can you impress your signification other with your cooking skills, but you can save a lot more money and eat healthier!

8. Never waste a moment to spend with your parents.

You’re not getting any younger, and neither are they.  Make the most out of every moment you spend with them.  You’ll be surprised to find that they might actually be a bit of fun.

9. Not all friends are here to stay.

While you’re growing up, so are your friends. You’ll drift apart, maybe even outgrow each other.  That’s ok.

10. Never take for granted the power of a good nap.

Naps have become fewer and far between since we were kids.  But when you have a chance to take a nap, do it! I have never met a nap I didn’t like.

11. Spend quality time with yourself.

I feel like your 20s are when you’re supposed to (if you haven’t already) figure out who you are.  Being around friends are awesome, but spending time alone is fun too.  Sometimes I will get in the car, park somewhere and read just to get a little alone time and enjoy my company.

12. It’s the little things that count.

Yes, big things that happen in your life count too, but we rarely think about the small things.  Seeing a dog, or a baby, or even getting in your bed after a long day.  Those are the things that make you happy, and you can always count on the little things.

13. Get out of your comfort zone.

I realize that this is easier said than done.  That being said, I have never regretted going out of my comfort zone, even if it’s something small.  Giving yourself that little push is all you need.

14. Grow from your experiences.

If I’m going through a difficult time, or even a fun time I always try to look back at the situation to figure out what I could have done differently, and what I can take away from that experience. This process has helped me so many times to not make the same mistakes twice.

15. Not everyone is going to like you.

I wish this was not the case.  That everyone I would come across had nice things to say about me, however, that’s not life.  People are going to hate you for things that don’t pertain to you.  You cannot control what others think, you just have to be yourself.

16. Spend your money wisely.

This is the best advice I could ever give myself.  The fact that I was able to buy myself a KitchenAid mixer is big for me.  You’ll want to spend your money on food now, but just wait until you want to go on a extravagant trip and have no money to do it.

17. If you feel like something needs to be said, say it.

I’ve spent so many hours just thinking of the things that I should have said when I had the chance.  When I wrote my Letter to Romeo, I felt like a great weight was lifted off of my shoulders because it was no longer taking up space in my mind.

18.  Learn to accept change.

If you’re like me, you do not like change unless you’ve weighed the pros and cons, made extensive lists, and with much thinking decided to change.  Sometimes change is unexpected and we have to just roll with it.  There’s not point of stressing over things that are out of our control.

19. There’s always something to learn.

Outside of school, I try to learn one new thing a day.  I know it doesn’t seem like a lot, but in the end you’ll be happy that you did.

20. Treat Yourself.

I know this seems simple to say, but I never really treated myself until I was just about 22 and bought my first Lilly Pulitzer dress.  Sometimes when you treat yourself every once and a while it gives you a little motivation, and you realize “Hey, I’m doing all right.”  And that’s exactly what you need.

21. Coffee dates are a must.

Getting coffee with someone is the perfect way to catch up with someone.  With lunches, you’re being interrupted by ordering food, receiving food, and of course eating.  Coffee is great because you will already have your drink, and really is a perfect platform to talk about anything under the sun in a nice atmosphere.

22. Don’t loose the little kid inside of you.

Once your “little” self is gone, there’s no getting her/him back.  Enjoy laughing or doing childish things every once in a while to remind yourself that life doesn’t always have to be a big ball of stress, but fun and young too!

23. You are your best friend.

If you don’t think of yourself as your best friend, you may never be happy.  You have to like yourself before you can like others.  Stay close, don’t let you forget who you are.